Transparency

“ Depressing, dejecting, disgusting”….my sons paused for a moment to catch their breath..”just when we thought our mother was the greatest writer ever “, their idol had fallen to shame, dashing their hopes of winning I pads and other inviting gizmos..”not at all impressive “ they rattled on , “hmph , not even a consolation prize in any of the contests”.
                 I bowed my head in shame , sorrow and sadness, the narcissist in me had on so many occasions given pats on my own back ,appreciating my abilities and exulting in the accomplishments. All along I had been writing on topics that seemed to come from somewhere deep within and this was one of the few instances when I had tried at writing on something which was thrust upon me. The poem for the ‘Dove contest’ came with a flourish or so I thought , I rued over it as it was unfair on  other contestants to write prose, attach beautiful images , pictures and even advertisement banners on to their entries , when all they asked us was to write a poem! My children continued where they had left off “ maybe the whole thing was fixed like the cricket matches “ they echoed in unison “ who knows”? Now I was feeling a trifle better , after all I lost not on account of my lack of creativity but for various other reasons…a bad workwoman always finds fault with her tools..somebody seemed to echo in my ears.
                     After every concert, just like how artists are hounded for autographs , I wanted to be mobbed by my fans applauding my work ,calling me a genius! I was now a wounded soldier and the little devils were rubbing in more salt ”if not the poem, atleast your essay should have won something “ the elder one was eyeing the playbook with utmost greed , the younger one sniggered and I murmured under my breath. The second attempt at the ‘Surf ‘contest too had ended in a naught , the soap bubbles had burst leaving me in a sorry state of affairs.
               The unsolicited cynicism and unwarranted comments made me to withdraw into a shell and introspect.The “indirank” statistics started to trouble me more than my own vital statistics, my rank was a good 58 at the start of my innings with ‘indiblogger’ which I considered excellent by any standards for a starter .
               Then I started waiting for the monthly ‘grades’ , I blogged as much as possible ,if and only I had worked like this for my 10 th board exams, I would have topped the charts! The results were out and my rank 65 ,went hammer and tongs over this phenomenal rise within a month feeling jubilant and ecstatic, literally over the moon!
                       But this euphoria did not last long, the next review had me slipping to 61, the lines that followed was indeed Greek and Latin to me , the moderator had suggested though my blogs were quite frequent, I did not have the necessary links, reviews and Google page ranks, desperately the next few minutes were spent in googling these words and after some time I gave up! It was like the circumstances that led to the great crash , where banks failed and stock markets had tumbled, the great recession had set in.
                     I sulked for a few days with utter distaste for myself ,deprived of motivation and topics- writers’ block had also found its way into me.I had fallen from a swashbuckling batswoman to a woefully out of form player and I knew my career had ended even before it took off or so I thought ,but hang on folks , I am the greatest optimist and hopes were steadfast and obstinate , so here I am going back to scratch , getting my basics right and not “bogged down” but “blogged up” with ferocious devotion!
                  And I took a vow not to participate in any contests , well at least till the time a new challenge is thrown up before me and the prizes look attractive to my sons!  

MONUMENTAL PERCEPTION

Oh look everybody! It was my husband exclaiming that the “cut out “ had ben brought down – the three of the remaining crew trained our eyes in the direction and found to our utter dismay and disappointment , the wonderful architectural marvel  we had drooled over , gone, vanished in thin air! My husband had  the ‘I told you so’ expression on his face as we stared at the empty horizon in sheer disbelief.
        For a few days now, our dinner table conversations revolved around that ‘astonishing spectacle’ which seemed to spring up one fine day in all its glory. Each one of us had our own thoughts and perception on it . First , it was about the location- my two sons ,who measure the length and breadth of the city in their school bus, shouted in chorus that this monument , though looked near was atleast 7 to 8 kilometres from our home- they even quoted the latitude and the longitude  of the place  and did some navigation on their smart phone to prove their claims. My husband pooh –pooohed their notion and emphatically stated that the distance between the object and the house would be only around 3 to 4 kilometres going by the curve of the elevated highway which formed the background. Not to be left behind , and unsure of whose side to be on, I carefully treaded  the middle path and proclaimed that it would be around 2 to 3 kilometres! The male bastion had only contempt for my views and scoffed at it, fully aware of my inglorious eyesight- I could read their minds when they thought in unison that I was born not with a silver spoon but with ‘spectacles’.
       Then came the shape , for me it was a replica of a ‘poorna kumbh’ which is an ornamental pot with decorations  and mango leaves and a coconut on top- this symbolizes goodness, wellbeing and prosperity as per Hindu beliefs.I was dead sure that the architect was a believer in vastu and the like.
        There was no vociferous disregard for this theory but they added their own ramifications – my younger one who was credited with having hawk eyes put forth a decorated dome with a pinnacle structure on top, we had one long ,hard look and did not deny his assertion  as we did not want to belittle his field of vision!
         My elder one , a  mathematical genius in his own right , added some dimension and articulated that the dome was not spherical but flattened at the sides , the professor fetching his binoculars to prove his point- there was craning of necks and straining of eyes to get a better glimpse and somehow his propounded theory could not be shot down!
       Day after day, we were overawed and delighted by the different shades and hues it presented itself and our speculations continued . On some nights, the illumination around it made us to wonder and ponder, argue and debate more and more- on one such occasion, it was a full moon day  and it bore a resplendent look that I firmly concluded , despite the male chauvinistic clan disapproving in totality, that it was a temple dedicated to Lord Sathyanarayana, an avatar of Vishnu . To support my claim , I argued that  offerings to please the deity are normally held on full moon days and hence the illumination.
       The lack of any consensus , like our political parties , in our household with regard to this structure , it was unanimously decided that on the next available holiday,we would explore , more so as each one of was desperate to prove our theory and assumption right!
        But the very next morning, the piece of marvel had simply vanished and that is when my engineering hubby shouted in jubilation that it was just a cardboard cut out erected for some big fat Indian wedding – for a few moments we all were transported to the world of Band, Baraat and Badhai and not even a monosyllable was uttered!
A couple of minutes later, routine , mundane activities had followed and nobody had the time to stand and stare.
            By early evening, the fog and mist on that  December day had lifted and lo and behold the venerable edifice was back to where it magnificently belonged and a huge shout of hurrah followed!
        The next instant, all of us were huddled in our car for the on site action- hardly had we covered  a mile, when a super imposing view of a Church with a dome  and a shining cross adorning the top came in full glare- we were stupefied, numb and speechless at this spectacular phenomenon , the creator had given us our fair chances to come out ith our takes and each one of was right in our own small way but the Lord had humbled us by the “WE KNOW ALL” attitude ……

Merry Christmas to the lovely bloggers …..  

AVARICE

Relationships hardly matter 
     when money do we cater 
     In a world so materialistic 
      and expectations  idealistic 

   Desires are insatiable 
    hunger for power inevitable 
   Like a glutton with ravenous appetite,
   Longing for more hence ready to fight 


GREED outweighing affection 
needs and wants an infection 
Itching to grab, loot and plunder 
The penurious heart never fonder 

 
A doleful inheritance tale but TRUE 
Bonding only with legal tender glue 
Love,  an empty coffer,  affinity measured by substance 

Bountiful assets and never ending AVARICIOUSNESS!